blessed_shaula

Are you feeling so empty and bored that you already feel you have a problem eventhough you’re practically fine? As a result, you tend to divert your dullness to something that you think is fun.. party, gimmicks, drinking, malling or anything that seems interesting to your preference. Then after all the fun you had and you’re back to your same old habits, the same old feelings of emptiness and boredom come back.

Last week, was prelims week.. and it really gave me a one heck of a kind battle with boredom. I was already tired of studying. I’ve been doing that for almost all my life. I was already fed up with my routines ‘coz in the first place, i don’t want routines! I tried to take reroutes so I always go to Baywalk, to malls and watch tv until my eyes get tired. Then I ended up always feeling unproductive and incomplete.

I’ve realized that i’m already loosing my track. My sense of purpose is fading everytime I entertain boredom. The moment i’ve learned about this, I’ve turned back to God and ask Him the things that he wants me to do. As I followed His will and not mine, I instantly regained the excitement towards life! It’s really just a matter of purpose. A life without a purpose is indeed not worth living.

If ever you’re experiencing what i’ve had, try God!:) He’ll never disappoint you…

          In everyhting we do, there is always an accompanied responsibility. For every action, there is an equal reaction. What you reap you sow…. I’m already getting tired of these prevailing laws! They are indeed inevitably true though I still believe that some things are really unfair. Well, we can’t really get absolute justice in this world. Utopia doesn’t exist here.

         Yesterday I came home with all my cells confused and busted. An unfair proctor… an insatiable credit card company…. a devastating  TIME magazine’s issue…. a screwed up governement….and so on and on! What is really going on in this world? Where have we all gone wrong?

          What is wrong with that so inconsiderate proctor? What the hell  does this big credit card company wants more? What in the world do these terrorists get from killing so many innocent victims? And what the heck is wrong with all the noisy Filipinos out in the streets who in real life situation doesn’t contribute something for the nation? I totally agree with what Sir Alex Magno says in his essay at the last page of TIME magazine’s July 18 issue. Please read it for goodness sake.

I just came home from my usual Saturday morning jogging and it’s  just now that i’ve realized that i really love doing that:) Perhaps it’s because i was doing it before just because i’m obliged to do so to battle certain physiological abnormalities. Or maybe i just really want to do it alone. Because when im alone i feel more carefree… i can still remember  how good it felt while running wild and free on a smooth paved road with tall grand trees beside…  while looking straight to the sun that’s about to set ahead. I was running as if i wanted to reach that  big pale orange sun on that beautiful late afternoon sky. The rush of the cold wind against my skin and hair made it even exciting for me to continue and never intend to stop. The entire road was mine! All mine! I was running alone and i was running really fast.I knew i was already tired but i ran faster instead. Then I suddenly  realized that from out of nowhere, someone was just few meters behind me.  I got distracted bUt i continued on running while trying to maitain my momentum. Then suddenly i dropped dead the moment the person behind caught me on my shoulder… Then i woke up only to found out that everthing was just a dream… grrr!

It’s been quite long before i had finally gotten over that dream. It was so lucid that it seems that all the senses were present there. I really wish i could be in that exact scenario in real life..

This morning i tried to enjoy running as i have enjoyed running on that dream.But it’s still kind of different. The dream seem more realistic and exciting! haha

I had several interpretations from that wonderful and puzzling dream. It actually revealed to me a lot about myself… what i really want and how i live my life.

Running doesn’t only boost my stamina. It also reminds me that i have the strength to press on. The harder i ran, the better i feel… because i belive that for every pain there is gain. The greater the gain, the farther i can go!:) The farther i can go…the more i can gain… and it goes on and on!:)

At the end of the road… when the journey is over… when i have already reached that big beautiful sun…i will  finally be complete:)